Whatever the weather.

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The family and I have just spent our festive season back in merry old England. The kids had wanted to experience a cold Christmas for the first time so our credit card duly obliged. By and by we had a marvellous time. All the box’s were ticked: Welcoming family and friends – tick, Christmassy vibe – tick, Corny Christmas songs piped out of every shop – tick, Trad Christmas day in quintessential bucolic countryside setting – tick; but but the weather! Shocking, miserable and dare I say it, depressing.

Ok, before you get on your high horse, I agree that you a) don’t go to the UK for the weather and b) we chose to go in winter, so what do you expect. I get that and accept it, but we were unfortunate to be there during the worst gales in 20 years. It was ghastly. It rained EVERYDAY.

When I lived in the UK, I can’t remember the weather much bothering me. It was what it was and you just dealt with it and went about your daily business. I even remember several conversations where I would spout on about how I could never live somewhere hot as, apparently, they had no seasons and that just wouldn’t do at all.

Turns out, though, that I’m a shallow, vacuous, sun chasing gimp. I can’t do wet, windy, cold and miserable anymore. I need regular sun on my pallid skin and a full range of shorts, t-shirts and thongs (flip-flops to you) in my wardrobe. I know this is going to make me look bad but its the only way for me. Don’t think for one minute I’ve turned my back on my heritage and a country that I love, I’ve just turned my back on heavy rain developing in the east with winds gusting to 70 kmh and a temperature high of -1 for the day.

This is not a call to all my friends and family, urging them to move south with the birds. They all seem very happy with their lives and far be it from me to tell them where and how they should live. But but, the weather. For me there is no going back (never say never). I couldn’t do it. I need the guarantee of warmth and sun. I like the fact that in my house I only have air-conditioners to cool and no radiator to warm. I like the fact that I do not own a heavy knit jumper and only a light rain coat. I love you England, but from now on its going to be from a warm and sunny distance.

PS: Its raining here.

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